aunt barb, aunt ruthellen, mom me, jane, mom
This blog has become more personal than I ever thought I'd get but as I continue to document the happenings in my life I realize this is my journal, my only journal really, so I want to write how I feel today.
I don't know how I'll be feeling later today but I have had some tender moments in the last 48 hours.
Monday morning: My mom was out of breath and has been for a few weeks, so my dad gave her a blessing and took her to InstaCare. They believed she has pnemonea but found some masses in her lungs so they made an appointment to see a lung specialist.
Monday 5:00: My sister called to tell me that my mom had masses on her neck and under her arm too. It didn't look good. It was probably cancer from some other source that had spread to her lungs.
I have never felt that way before and I hope to never feel it again. My wonderful neighbors came and took my kids and I sat on the stairs and stared out the window. Dinner was needing to be finished, the table was set for dinner, laundry needed to be folded, but time stopped. My table is still set for Monday night's dinner and it is Wednesday morning. Time has stopped. My laundry list of things I need to get done has been put on hold. My mom means everything to me. She is the glue that holds my family together.
Tuesday: She had the mass on her neck biopsy and we'll get the results this afternoon.
We had a family fast for her. All who could, fasted for her. We have an army of faith in our family and we are all praying for a miracle. Miracles do happen and I know it is because of faith.
We gathered last night as a family to break our fast and pray together. I wish I took pictures. It was a tender moment to see all of us together, scared to death, but humbled.
I don't know what kind of news we will get today. Hopefully good news and this will just have been a learning experience (a short and painless learning experience) but I wanted to remember this.
Keep us in your prayers!!